Tag: Childbirth
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The Midwife’s Mask
Your baby goes to NNU For tests and drugs That’s what they do But now the mood has somewhat changed An urgent move must be arranged Your baby’s not had a great start Seems there’s a problem with her heart We think these days we know it all With all our clever tools and tricks…
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Cord Prolapse
So many dramas in my job I couldn’t list them all There’s much scope for disagreement Between all of those on call Stuck shoulders, Haemorrhage, fitting Arrest, demise, collapse But my favourite drama of them all? A good old Cord Prolapse It’s when the umbilical cord Slips down below baby’s head We have to get…
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My Balancing Act
We’re here to speak for women Help them have the births they crave Sometimes evidence does not agree So are they wrong? Or are they brave? When I first started midwifing The new buzz word was choice Every woman would be offered it Our job? To raise their voice But this idea had many flaws…
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Don’t forget the pillow!
We rush to theatre An emergency All eyes are on The CTG The midwife must Remember much And still be calm This woman’s crutch The woman must be In a gown Does she have any Caps or crowns? What’s her Obstetric history? Does she have any Allergies? When did she eat? When did she drink?…
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Going the Extra Mile
There’s a lady in the waiting room Who doesn’t have a bed We hope to get her done today That’s why she’s not been fed But every time I see a chance A slot to fit her in Someone else just jumps the queue Today I’m firefighting There’s a lady in the waiting room The…
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Making people cry
I arrive at work early All eager and keen And I answer the phone Before I have seen The true state of this place For they’re all behind doors All those women now labouring Some on all fours So I tell this poor woman To stay home and wait A Caesarian was planned She was…
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My Thought for the Day
The woman who’s talking On thought for the day Has just spoken of midwives At long last! Hooray. For the rest of the world A small glimpse of a view And a chance of an insight Into how we see you We’re just hard working lads Trying to earn a fair buck Have some laughs,…
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Perks of my job: Camaraderie
A Super Special Sisterhood After all of these years I thought I’d seen it all But nothing prepared me For tonight’s desperate call It went out on Facebook At quarter to eight It said “please come and help, We don’t care if you’re late” “We have 15 inductions And 10 natural labours Please please come…
Mythical Midwife 